


No More Than He Deserves

by Unforth



Series: All For One, One For All [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Barebacking, Blindfolds, Bottom Dean, But Not As Top As Castiel, Butt Plugs, Castiel and Jimmy Novak Are Twins, Dean Has Self-Esteem Issues, Dom Castiel, Dom Jimmy, Double Penetration, Established Relationship, Incest, Is Anyone Surprised that Dean Has Self-Esteem Issues?, John Winchester's A+ Parenting, Light Dom/sub, M/M, M/M/M, Oral Sex, Orgasm Delay/Denial, POV Dean Winchester, POV Third Person Limited, PWP, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Polyamory, Sex Toys, Sub Dean, Threesome - M/M/M, Top Castiel, Top Jimmy, Twincest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-04
Updated: 2015-07-04
Packaged: 2018-04-07 17:14:38
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,789
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4271412
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Unforth/pseuds/Unforth
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Though Dean, Castiel and Jimmy have been a threesome for some time, Dean constantly struggles to express what he wants, feeling he doesn't deserve the pleasure. Cas and Jimmy are there to decide *exactly* what he deserves - and to give it to him. Utter smutty PWP with d/s elements. M/M/M, Cas and Jimmy are twins, vaguely defined real world modern AU.</p>
            </blockquote>





	No More Than He Deserves

**Author's Note:**

> I have a really nasty spring cold. It's had me pretty much down for the count since Wednesday, and that's made it super hard to get anything done that requires concentration. Despite that, last night I had massive insomnia - fell asleep after 11 PM, woke up around 2 AM, and that was that. Instead of dozing off again, my brain started writing smut. Specifically, this smut. When I gave up on trying to sleep, I finished the story in my head in the hopes that I'd manage more sleep when it was done, and when that failed, I sat up in bed at 4 in the damn morning and wrote this whole thing in five hours.
> 
> Gave myself the day to theoretically sleep (but didn't actually, wtf brain...played Dragon Age instead...) and then edited it over the last few hours.
> 
> It's probably a bit of a mess. I'm a bit of a mess. I have a history of writing things after massive insomnia bouts and thinkin' they're the shit only to discover...yeah, they're shit alright. However, re-reading it gave me the chance to fix the most egregious problems, and I'm still fairly sure it's hot and not crappy.
> 
> I'm sorry this isn't...any of the other things I should be working on (well, okay, there's only three...). I feel a bit better today than the last few days, but still not well enough to actually concentrate on anything that has even a vaguely cohesive plot...and "Devil Went Down to Detroit" and "No Way Out" both have pretty detailed plots, and the next installment of "I Dream of Deanie" is going to be the first without the PWP/Plot What Plot? tag, cause...there's plot. So...I just couldn't, not right now. Maybe tomorrow? I called in to work...(Oh, and if you're reading this, and you've messaged or commented on something and I haven't written back, the cold is why...gonna tackle that tomorrow too, sorry...)
> 
> Some actual notes:  
> 1\. Utterly, shamelessly inspired by [Meringue](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1629848) by [SurlyCat](http://archiveofourown.org/users/SurlyCat/pseuds/SurlyCat). I never shipped these three until I read that story, and now I find I make up stories about them as a threesome surprisingly often. If you're into this kind of thing and you haven't read her story...you should. Cause it's kinda like this story except more awesome - like seriously, I've read it three times since my first time like five weeks ago.  
> 2\. This is the first threesome I've ever written. So...that might mean something. I dunno.  
> 3\. I am not that hip on d/s culture. Everything I know I learned from my one dom friend and from reading fic. So, if this is horribly inaccurate, I'm sorry...I tried to capture the elements I've seen and like and find hot. If I'm way off base, please offer con crit. :)  
> 4\. Forgive Dean's whiny inner monologue, please, especially early on...we all know Dean...it's not as bad as he thinks...it's never as bad as he thinks...  
> 5\. I tried to put everything in the tags? I suck at tagging. I'm sorry.  
> 6\. As far as I'm concerned, this is a one shot. That doesn't mean I definitely will never write more, but...don't get your hopes up.

Dean woke to mid-morning sunshine barely contained by the curtains Cas had insisted on hanging in their bedroom in a bed depressingly empty save for himself. A warm glow of anticipation settled in his gut. _Maybe today_. With a huge stretch, he felt his joints shift and pop, his toes curling at the pleasant sensation. Stifling a yawn against the back his hand, he got up, used the bathroom, and went to check the table just outside the bedroom door for what he hoped, prayed, desperately needed to have waiting for him.

The table bore a thick, wide blindfold, carefully folded; a bottle of lubricant, half-empty; and a good-sized blue, sparkly butt plug. All of those were expected. The three had been taunting him for days, promising him pleasures, giving him no way of predicting when such promises might be delivered on.

The presence of a single sheet of paper led him to heave a relieved sigh. Finally.

 _Use these to get ready for us_ , it read in Cas’ distinctive angular cursive, continuing in Jimmy’s nearly illegible scrawl, _wait for us on the bed._

The heat of expectation burgeoned, sending a pulse through his body that forced a shudder through his shoulders, spawned a rapid, involuntary shake of his head, and half-hardened him instantly. He glanced for a moment towards the kitchen. There wasn’t much to the twin’s apartment: a bedroom with an enormous king-size bed that would have been comfortably big enough for three if Jimmy didn’t sprawl in his sleep; a kitchen with a double oven perfect for making dinner and dessert in one go; a living room with the gorgeous wide screen TV. Movie nights with Cas, his best friend since high school, had been the original, ostensible reason he’d come over so often – that, and the fact that he’d been forced to drop his own place and move into his car after the mechanic shop where he’d worked for nearly a decade had been forced to shut down. They didn’t know that. They knew he’d lost his job, but he’d no intention of showing what a fuck up he was by revealing how fucked he was financially, with Sam’s loans hanging over his head and only 15 hours a week at $10 an hour. He’d still been working full time and had his own place when the three of them had started...whatever the fuck they were doing. Even then, he’d spent the night more often than not. Now, both were flat-out shocked if he suggested he was going to sleep anywhere else, and he was too much of a fucking coward to admit that he didn’t want to sleep in the Impala over the cold winter nights. With spring heating up, he’d do better. He might be a loser, but he still had some self-respect, and that included autonomy, and not admitting he had nowhere to go.

Neither brother was home now. Cas was teaching the Psych 101 class he hated so damn much. Jimmy was at his advanced research seminar. Dean was in the apartment, alone, because he was fucking useless. Normally, this would when he’d clean everything up and put together some lunches and dinners for everyone. It was the least he could do. However, the fridge was full of leftovers, the apartment was fucking spotless from his manic attempts of the day before, and they’d finally, _finally_ , left him the note.

Thank fucking _God_.

Objectively, he knew he should eat and drink before he began. Objectively, he knew that the twins would get off on delaying his gratification as long as they themselves could bear it, as long as they thought he could bear it. Objectively, he knew it was going be a long day of desperate, horny waiting. Objectively, he knew that a few minutes one way or the other wouldn’t make a lick of difference in how long before they came to use his body. Objectively, he knew if he started now, he’d be waiting that much longer, and he’d be doing it on an empty stomach.

What if he stuffed himself with an omelet and water, only to have to use the bathroom in a couple hours? What if _that_ was when they got back? He might never get another chance, they might never forgive him for such a failure.

Objectivity could go fuck itself. He _needed_ this, needed _them_. He needed lust and desire and tight anticipation to wipe his mind clear of every distraction. He needed Jimmy and Cas to flood his thoughts and his body until there wasn’t room for anything but euphoric delight.

Grabbing the three items, he returned to their bed, tying the blindfold over his eyes as he did. Instantly, the room was plunged into peaceful darkness, the thick, padded fabric not allowing the least hint of light in. Dean lay back, positioning himself, legs splayed wide, lubricant bottle and plug in easy reach. A shiver coursed through him, cool air against his skin, desire rippling goose bumps over his flesh.

 _Fuck_ did he need this.

Dean squeezed a dollop of thick lube into the cupped palm of his left hand. As he waited for the chill liquid to warm, he ran his fingers over the familiar silicone of the plug. Thick as two of his fingers, it was narrower and shorter than either Jimmy or Cas, and with its spiral shape, it bore little resemblance to an actual dick. That was why he liked this one, it felt amazing inside him – especially when one of the brothers twisted it and Dean could _feel_ those corkscrew ridges moving against his the sensitive flesh inside him – without upstaging the real deal. His insides went molten just thinking about it. Unable to wait any longer, he placed the plug between his legs, ready to go, coated the fingers of his right hand in the puddle of thinned, heated lube, and reached between his legs.

The first brush of the pad of his finger against his entrance was electric and forced his breath through clenched teeth. _Shit,_ he was sensitive today. The skin around his pucker was wrinkled, tight – it had been two weeks since he’d had anyone or anything inside him, two weeks of expectation, two weeks waiting for the twins to have decide he had earned the chance to try doing this with them. Swirling wet liquid over his hole, he was glad that neither of his lovers was there to see how desperate he already was, to hear his panting, to feel his heart racing, to wrap fingers around his fully hardened cock. The thought teased a groan from him – strong, lithe hands around him, stroking him, taunting him – and he pressed the finger through taut muscles. With his finger liberally coated with lube, there was no burn, just wonderful stretching and a burst of hot sparks as he penetrated himself, leaned forward and strained to work his pointer in to the knuckle. Another groan wracked him as he accidentally brushed the thin wall that separated his tight channel from his prostate. Too long – it had been too long – maybe this wasn’t such a good idea – before the thought could fully form, he pulled out, lined up a second finger, and spread himself open with both. Breath-taking warmth and arousal washed over him like a warm sea, and relief eased through him.

This was a fantastic idea. Best fucking idea ever.

With two fingers seated in him as far as he could drive them, Dean made quick work of preparing himself. He thrust the fingers in and out, smearing himself with lube. Each time he withdrew, he separated the fingers, widening his hole, preparing the tight ring of muscles for the greater intrusion to come. The plug had an unusually thick base, which made it lousy for wearing out but perfect for times like this, when he had nothing to do but wait patiently and make sure his body was ready whenever the twins decided they were ready. When his body no longer fought the intrusion, but instead relaxed around it, welcomed it, begged for more, Dean stopped and removed the slick fingers. Taking up the toy, he coated it liberally in the lube still held in his quivering left hand, and pressed the thin tip against himself.

Dean took a deep breath and plunged the butt plug into his channel with one harsh, quick motion, groaning hugely as each ridge of the spiral forced through the tight muscles. Seating it home, he instantly began to tremble. Every iota of his being screamed for him to pull it out once more, to thrust it in and out until he lost his fucking mind. God, he needed that, he needed to be filled, he needed that glorious feeling to suffuse him until he shook apart without anyone even touching his dick. One finger at a time, he forced himself to release his grip on the base of the plug, forced himself to close his legs around it. The movement shifted the toy enticingly, and only in the quiet of his own mind would he confess that the sound that escaped him was a desperate whimper. Wiping his hands negligently on the sheets, Dean rolled over and positioned himself where he thought the center of the enormous bed was. Hands directly beneath his shoulders, knees lifting his ass up, Dean let his head hang limply between his arms and waited on all fours.

The blindfold made the passage of time impossible to assess. There was no light in the world, only velvet blackness. Air gently brushed over him as the air conditioning system kicked on, teasing at his skin, making a faint buzzing that seemed loud by comparison to the quiet suffusing the room, suffusing his mind. The air didn’t kick off again until the room was cold enough to pucker his nipples, painfully tight and desperate for eager fingers to twist and rub them. Thoughts of what was to come kept his erection bulky between his legs. Though he heard occasional noise – the sound of a truck passing by, the keen of sirens in the distance, the heavy slam as a neighbor opened and close their door – none of them answered the question that burned in his gut. Was he alone? The twins expert at stalking into the room silently and taking him by surprise. They might be watching him right then, standing in the doorway, staring at the his spread legs, the end of the blue plug sticking out of him, the bobble of his cock as he imagined them both closing the distance to cover him in kisses and caresses. Only strict control kept him from shivering, kept him from shifting his knees to feel the toy move inside his body.

They _might_ be watching him, or they might be minutes, hours away. There was no way for him to know. They, on the other hand, could be in no doubt what awaited them. Dean was obedient. They knew that. Dean was willing. They knew that. Dean was desperate for them. They knew that. Wherever they were, they knew _exactly_ what pleasures were in store, and he hoped their need was as acute as his.

No, he didn’t have to hope that, he reminded himself with a swallow that was surprisingly difficult to get down his tense throat. As much as it astonished him, they’d made it clear that they wanted him as much as he wanted them. It was inconceivable, yet they did. That was why he needed this, needed today. He had to show that he could earn their desire, had to show that he was worthy of the care they took of him.

Hours passed. It must have been hours. His erection flagged, only to return when his ears caught the least hint that perhaps someone was in the apartment. His arms and shoulders ached from holding him up. His ass tingled at the bulk opening him, desperate for friction and movement and hard pressure against the most sensitive places in his body. His eyes blinked against the cloth of the blindfold, world precisely as dark regardless of whether his lids were open or closed. In the black, he was keenly aware of his entire body, of every breath he forced out evenly and slowly, of his elevated heart rate, of his tight balls and endlessly twitching erection. There was nothing in the world but his powerful muscles, his needy flesh, his waning and waxing arousal, his chill skin.

It had to be hours, hours of anticipation, hours of want. He could do this. He had to do this.

Fingers wrapped around the end of the plug, pulled it out nearly all the way, and drove it back into him hard. A gasp of relief broke into a choked sob as the thin, blunt tip slammed against his prostate. Instantly, he was so hard that his cock hurt and he frantically bit his lip against further sounds. He was achingly desperate to show that he could be good, to show that he deserved this, and he’d _already_ screwed up. Fucking _dammit_ , why couldn’t he do _anything_ right?

“Someone can’t follow simple instructions.” Castiel’s sultry, deep voice rumbled along Dean’s spine like a touch, but with the initial shock past, Dean was able to keep from moving, keep from vocalizing.

“Come on, bro,” Jimmy’s voice was as low, but the bantering tone made it sound higher. “Cut him some slack. He’s just happy to _see_ us, right, Dean?”

The faint tang of blood against his tongue, the twinge of pain in his mouth where he’d bit himself, served as a source of essential stability and sanity. He mustn’t answer. Focusing on the coppery flavor, he calmed his body as best he could, his breath evened out again. Weight settled on the bed beside him. The toy inside him turned, rippling the raised corkscrew against his loosened channel, billowing hot want through his body. Jimmy’s question hung in the air. He didn’t make a sound. No one had given him permission to speak, no one had given him permission to move. He’d already fucked up – tears of frustration dampened the cloth over his eyes – but he wouldn’t again. He _could_ do this, he could. He’d show them, show himself, that he could.

“You may be right,” Castiel mused from behind him, which meant Cas was the one taunting his ass with slight, unsatisfactory thrusts of the butt plug, and Jimmy sat beside him on the bed. The two twins were nearly identical, only different affect, different haircuts and different taste in clothing to tell them apart. It didn’t matter. Dean knew both men inside and out, and even when he couldn’t see them, they had to be actively trying to fool him to prevent him knowing which was which. “However, he needs to learn there are consequences for his actions.”

“Fair enough,” Jimmy’s weight shifted and a hand landed on Dean’s head, brushing roughly through his hair. At least they were touching him. At least – _fuck_ yeah – Cas plunged the plug deeply into him, and Dean trembled with the effort of not rocking back against that it, of not moaning his pleasure. “What did you have in mind?” Hot breath ghosted through the hairs that Jimmy tousled, Jimmy’s face close enough for Dean to feel each distinct puff from each word. His cock gave an enthusiastic throb that brushed pre-come onto his belly.

The plug stopped moving, half in, half out of his body, and Cas removed his hands from it. Jimmy’s hand left his head and Dean allowed it to drop limply towards the bed.

“We could make him wait longer.”

“That seems fair.”

The stir of breath was gone, the mattress shifting beneath Dean as Jimmy moved away again. Dean tensed and relaxed his elbows as needed to ensure that he moved as little as possible even as the bed rocked and threatened his balance.

“What do you think, Dean?” The teasing, playful tone of Jimmy’s voice couldn’t hide the rasping undertone. Dean knew thick desire when he heard it, knew every inflection of their speech. The springs creaked, and Dean was alone on the bed once more.

“You may answer,” added Cas.

“Whatever you want,” Dean answered immediately, voice cracking dryly. He really should have had something to drink first. He knew the rules. Once the scene started, he was not to move unless told to, not to speak unless told to, he was to do nothing, not suck, not clench, not touch, and certainly not come, without precise instructions. The rules couldn’t _be_ simpler, but he’d fucked them up. He hoped they punished him. He deserved to be punished.

A finger brushed the plug, nudging it into a more secure position within him, teased over his coccyx, swirled over his rounded ass cheeks, flicked at one of the dimples on his lower back, pressed for an instant against the base of his spine, and then was gone.

The silence stretched out.

“I’m hungry,” Jimmy said casually. “You hungry, Cassie?”

“I could eat.” The low, gruff tone made the words sound criminally dirty. Even blindfolded, Dean could feel the heat of their eyes on him. For an instant, Dean’s thoughts spun out a fantasy of Cas’ luscious mouth around him, licking up the pre-ejaculate leaking from his tip, swallowing around him, driving him crazy as Jimmy played with the butt plug and whispered in his ear, reminding him of the consequences if Dean came a moment sooner than they said he could. A low chuckle emerged, guttural, from one of the twins, though for once Dean had no idea which.

“Have you tried that Thai place across town yet?” Jimmy’s tone remained flippant as it grew subtly quieter with distance. The thick carpeting muted their steps as they moved away.

“No,” said Cas. “Is it good?” There was a rattle of metal – keys, Dean thought – and a tinkling he couldn’t place. His ears strained for every sound. More fucking _waiting_. It was the least punishment he deserved, he castigated himself. They should have ended the scene, told him to put his damn cloths back on and get out, left him to sleep it off in the Impala without even a cold shower to dull the ache of thwarted desire. They should leave and not come back until it was too late to continue, force him to spend the night lying between their fucking gorgeous, sleek, toned, bodies, plug still in place, their pajamas brushing his over-sensitized skin as they slept peacefully, left him desperate and awake to contemplate what a fucking failure he was.

“You went there with Sam last week, right?”

“We ended up going for Mexican instead,” Jimmy corrected to the accompaniment of the door being opened unnecessarily loudly. If Dean could hear it, it was because they wanted him to hear it. They should have fucked him within an inch of his life and then left him hard and screaming for release that they wouldn’t grant. “How about we…” The voices faded to nothing as the door closed with a muffled thud.

A shudder wracked Dean’s body, but he didn’t move, and he didn’t make a sound. He didn’t need eyes on him to be good. He could be good. He had to be. Otherwise, what use was he?

In light of the brief, teasing visit of the twins, there was no waning of his arousal. Only concentrated effort kept him still, kept him breathing in through his nose and out through his mouth. Damp spots formed on the blindfold where his eyes slowly leaked moisture. Pitch dark minutes stretched out in the silent apartment, the sounds of the world beyond no longer audible over the hum of arousal in his ears. His muscles quaked with fatigue, his cock throbbed in time to his irrepressibly quickened heartbeat, and sweat dampened his hair, trailed down his spine, trickled down his forehead to be absorbed by the blindfold. Lube made a chill line as it leaked from his body and down his leg. No matter what, _no matter what_ , he would prove himself when they returned, however long that was. He’d be quiet. He wouldn’t move. He wouldn’t come. He’d…

Hands clasped his ass cheeks, his cock, the plug, too many hands, fist stroking simultaneously with the toy plunging deeply in him. Incandescent pleasure exploded in his gut, his cock, his ass, his mind.

Dean didn’t move, and he didn’t make a sound.

“So good for us,” Cas’ voice broke, hot against Dean’s back side. The toy twisted and thrust into him hard, angled expertly to strike him to ensure it struck him just right. The grip on his cock loosened as a nail played at his slit, smearing pre-come, using the liquid to moisten the head as fingers massaged the head of his cock roughly. _Fuck_ , that felt good. They knew exactly how to take him apart, angelic _bastards_. “I knew you could be this good for us, Dean.”

“You may tell us how you feel,” said Jimmy, breathy as his lips brushed ever so lightly over Dean’s inner thigh.

Dean freed a  moan that he’d barely contained, a base sound that shattered into a gasp as the toy continued to tease at him. Soon, they’d pull it out and replace it with one of their cocks, or…or…fuck, he didn’t even dare think of the or, didn’t dare hope for the alternative. He didn’t deserve more, not now. “Thank you,” he managed. The hand left his dick, left the toy for a moment, and there were only two hands on him – spreading his cheeks apart. “Thank you, angels.” A hum of approval met his words, one of the hands on his ass shifted to the toy and turned it slowly. Pleasure cascaded through his body as the corkscrew twisted and he panted loudly, not having been told to be quiet again. “Feels so good.” Weight settled on the bed beside him once more, moving closer with the whisper of springs and a clatter as the headboard banged against the wall. The neighbors would _love_ that. “More than I deserve, more than…” Thick fingers stuffed into his mouth and choked the words off, and there was a stinging swat on his ass cheek. Both men went completely still.

“We decide what you deserve,” murmured Cas from behind him. Good. Given the choice, he’d rather have Cas inside him, not because Jimmy wasn’t just as good to him, but because Cas…was _Cas_.For all that they made a threesome, before Dean had known Jimmy, there had been Cas, and all three knew that if Dean was ever somehow forced to pick, he’d choose Castiel every time. He needed both twins, though. The thought of losing either was horrific and shivered through his body unpleasantly. “We decide if you’ve been good or bad, and whether you deserve reward or punishment.”

Jimmy’s fingers were in his hair, lifting his limp head. The hand in Dean’s mouth teased at his palette, rubbed his tongue, and Jimmy ran a thumb over his thick lips. “Don’t worry,” Jimmy said reassuringly. “You’ve been very good.”

The fingers left his mouth trailing thick spit over his lips. “Thank…” Dean’s words were interrupted once again, this time by Jimmy maneuvering Dean’s head, bringing Dean’s lips against the white-hot heat and smooth temptation of hard cock.

“No more noise from you,” Jimmy chastised him gently, smearing pre-come over Dean’s lips.

Letting his jaw go slack, Dean’s mouth fell open and, as difficulty as it was, he waited. Jimmy painted his cheeks, moaned at the feel of stubble against his tender dick, squeezed teasing drops of pre-come onto Dean’s tongue with an explosion of salt and musk and the hint of anise-like bitterness that was uniquely Jimmy. The moment stretched out, Cas’ hands not moving, Jimmy’s grip on Dean’s head not shifting, the cock so close that each time it twitched, the delicate skin brushed Dean’s lips. He wanted to suck on it, tongue at the slit, drink in every molecule of delicious liquid, make Jimmy feel good, so good. But he didn’t move.

“You have no idea how good you are, do you, Dean?” Jimmy whispered tenderly. The fingers knotted through his hair gently caressed at Dean’s skull, spreading soothing peace to counterpoint strangely with all the longing that choked at him. Each massaging touch tugged Dean a little forward, and he relaxed into Jimmy’s manipulation, lips spread wide enough that Jimmy barely brushed them as he pulled Dean around his cock. Pre-come dripped directly onto his tongue, and had he not been blindfolded, Jimmy would have seen Dean’s eyes roll back as he desperately struggled not to swallow, not to suck and give delight. “No one has ever been good to us like you are. You’re perfect, Dean.”

 _I’m not_. Negativity flooded his thoughts. He was worthless, mediocre, unable to fix his broken family, barely able to help his younger brother, hardly capable of holding down a steady job, too stupid for college, too damaged to accept even simple words of affection.

Jimmy thrust lazily into his mouth, holding his head still, cock striking against Dean’s rough palette, running smoothly over his tongue.

“You’re perfect, Dean,” echoed Cas, withdrawing the butt plug nearly all the way, sinking it back in at an angle that glanced the ridges over his prostate.

Dean was a walking fucking disaster, but he could be perfect for Castiel and Jimmy. He could do this for them.

“Show me how perfect you are,” said Jimmy encouragingly, swallowing a growl deep in his throat. “Use your mouth to show me.”

That was all the permission Dean needed. Swirling his tongue over the vein on the base of Jimmy’s cock, Dean wrapped his lips around the thick weight and sucked hard, swallowing all the saliva that had accumulated in his mouth, all the pre-come that had dripped free. Jimmy groaned and thrust hard into Dean’s mouth, rocking him backwards, rocking him into Cas, who plunged the toy deeply into Dean once more. His mouth was so wet that Jimmy slid in and out easily, his ass so lubricated that there wasn’t the least pain, as the brothers pulled him back, pushed him forward, giving him fucking _bliss_ from both ends. It washed over him in waves, his vision bright white despite the cloth covering his eyes, his thoughts blanked of self-loathing, blanked of unworthiness, blanked of everything except how good they made him feel, how good he could make them feel. Sucking hard on Jimmy’s cock, swallowing, tonguing around it, he delighted in every beautiful sound he earned by his efforts. He was nothing but darkness, nothing but sensation, nothing but aching need and longing and satisfaction and heat, nothing but the hand maneuvering his hips, nothing but the toy rubbing through him, nothing but the hand expertly steering his head, nothing but the cock filling his mouth.

“Remember, Dean,” Cas’ voice came, low and guttural and wrecked. _Cas is going to fill me, he’s going to, it’s going to be his cock inside me, his come leaking from me tonight_. The thought brought such pleasure that Dean barely contained himself. His elbows gave for an instant before he locked them once more, his cock leaked, he felt thick drops fall free to the bedding beneath. “Not a sound. Not a twitch. And you _may not come_ until we tell you. Nod if you understand.”

 _Nod if you are doing alright – nod if it’s okay for us to keep going, since you can’t safe word with Jimmy’s cock halfway down your throat_. That was what Cas’ question meant. Dean had just enough awareness to know that, just enough to nod enthusiastically. Fuck yeah, he understood. If they stopped now he’d cry, just breakdown and sob his fucking eyes out. He needed this so much he could hardly stand it. He wasn’t supposed to need anyone. He was supposed to be the strong one, he was supposed to be the capable one. He wasn’t supposed to have wants or desires, wasn’t allowed to ask for anything for himself, to save anything for himself, to have anything that was just his. Everything was for the family. Everything was for Sammy. Jimmy and Cas gave him everything he craved, and he had no right to any of it.

The butt plug was yanked violently from his ass. His thighs quivered, his body shrieked protest at the removal, and he repressed it all, held himself still, silenced the aggrieved moan that bubbled in his chest even as Jimmy began to fuck his mouth more violently.

Cas and Jimmy decided what he deserved.

Weight settled on the mattress between his legs. He could be good for them, had to be good to them, and then let them determine what he was allowed to want, what he was allowed to have. Occasionally, now, he could ask for what he wanted. Usually, he couldn’t. Whether he did or not, they knew, somehow they knew. If he was obedient, they would give it to him.

God, they were fucking _perfect_. He had no right to something this perfect.

Hands held Dean’s hips still and the thickness of Cas’ cock pressed against Dean’s open, leaking entrance. Neither twin was small – quite the contrary, each was larger than Dean, if not so long – and one of Cas was nearly two of the toy. Cas’ tip breached him easily with a burst of euphoric pleasure, then stopped, caught and held by muscles that strained to prevent the intrusion. Dean wanted to relax, was desperate to relax, but his body screamed fatigue and horniness. Calming himself enough to permit Cas entry would mean calming his thoughts. Without the tension firm in his thoughts, his elbows would give way and he’d collapsing against the bed, his arousal would escape his control and he’d cream the sheets the instant Cas was inside him. With a wicked chuckle, Jimmy thrust hard into Dean’s mouth and shoved him backward. Simultaneously, Cas gripped his hips and pulled Dean against him. The broad head of Cas’ dick forced into Dean all at once and Cas ground out a profound groan. Tears streamed from Dean’s eyes at the effort of not screaming his pleasure around the cock stuffing his mouth, of not coming on the spot at the joy of being filled on both ends.

“So good,” Cas moaned. His hands clenched on Dean’s hips, tugging him back even as Jimmy tried to pull him forward. With twin wet squelches, Cas slid all the way into him and Jimmy’s cock sprang free from his mouth. Hardness stretched him open, friction coursed gloriously through his tight insiders, bluntness slammed against his prostate, and for an instant the entire world disappeared in a roar as of rushing wind, light as bright as a fucking solar flare, and pleasure so intense Dean could barely grasp the terrified thought that he had just had his orgasm.

_No, no, no, no, can’t come, can’t yet, have to be good for them, have to be, have to be…_

“Dean.”

_No, no, no…_

“Dean, you have to answer me.” Cas’ voice won faintly through the noise and brightness filling his head like fucking salvation.

_No…no…_

“Cas.”

Their positions were all different. There was still a cock inside him, but his legs straddled hips, his lower back rested on the sheets. Behind him, warmth and strength supported his shoulders. His arms shook uselessly at his sides, his head lolled, everything was darkness and tingling heat and sensitivity to the least touch. Aching, painful need spiked through his body and his erection throbbed against his thigh.

“Didn’t come,” he mumbled.

“No,” Cas’ voice was thick with lust and tenderness. “Are you alright?”

Hands cupped his cheeks, wiping thick moisture from them. Tears, he realized, tears that had fallen so thick they’d soaked the blindfold and dripped free. Saliva coated his chin, sweat made cold droplets all over his chest, dripped from sodden spikes of brown hair, streamed down his spine. Behind him, Jimmy shifted, holding him up.

“ ‘m ok,” he whispered. Shame whispered through him. They’d had to stop to check on him. They’d had to move his body because he was so weak he couldn’t do it himself. _Useless, pathetic, worthless…_ The words echoed through his thoughts, his father’s voice, a lifetime of condemnation and inadequacy. _Waste of space, stupid, incompetent…_

“Do you want to keep going?” Jimmy said, a fucking beacon of hope breaking through the endless soliloquy of guilt and self-doubt in Dean’s head. Even three years dead, John Winchester never stopped causing Dean to feel like shit about himself.

“Yes.” Dean struggled to move, to support his body weight, but his arms were dead weight, and his legs trembled, the muscles refusing to engage. “I can be good for you…hafta be good for you…”

“You are,” Cas said. Weight shifted beneath Dean, around him, Cas’ hardness twitching inside Dean. A groan burst from him, and his embarrassment spiked, his cheeks growing scaldingly hot. He bit down on his lip hard enough to force a whimper out, drawing blood once again. The pain threaded through the pleasure and his thoughts began to float like he’d found his way onto a cloud. “It’s okay. You may make noise now.” Cas brought their chests together, his arms wrapping around Dean’s, hands slipping between Jimmy’s chest and Dean’s back to lay atop each of Dean’s shoulders, drawing Dean forward easily. Their lips brushed, Cas’ plus and soft against Dean’s dry mouth, and Dean’s skin tingled in response. His body was so wrought he hardly felt like he was in it any more, his thoughts fragmenting under the renewed onslaught of pleasure. “You’re everything we’ve ever dreamed of, Dean. You always are.” The praise washed over him, bringing a shy smile to his face. Cas shifted their weight back on to the mattress as Jimmy grabbed Dean’s legs, shifting his body around as if he were a child, a puppet with its strings cut. He was a body for them to enjoy, nothing more… “We’re going to give you what you want now.” …except that he was so much more, because they wanted him to feel good, too, wanted him to be happy, wanted to know what he desired, wanted to give it to him.

He’d never done anything to deserve this. He was such a lucky sonuvabitch.

Cas lay flat on the bed, Dean straddling his hips, Cas’ arms held them together, held their chests flush. Behind them, between Cas’ legs, Jimmy’s movements caused the mattress to bounce. Anticipation caught at Dean, knotted his stomach, brought his drifting thought crashing down to his body and 100% Grade A USDA approved _want._ His cock spit pre-come onto Cas’ bare chest, every muscle in Dean’s back and ass tense. Cas grunted at the feeling, hips giving a sharp thrust into Dean, who shivered as friction whispered heat through him.

“Wanted this for so long…” Dean whimpered. Jimmy’s cock, still slick with saliva, came to rest between Dean’s ass cheeks, his crack spread wide by his splayed legs, his hole stretched around Cas. “Wanted this…” Cas’ hands shifted to Dean’s biceps, grounding him, clutching him securely, as Jimmy’s grip came to rest on Dean’s shoulder blades and softly began to knead at his rigid muscles. So gently, the younger twin worked his way soothingly down Dean’s back.

“I know,” Cas whispered, breath humid against Dean’s ear. “I know you have. I’m glad you asked. I’m so glad you asked. You’re always so good, Dean. You think you don’t deserve this, but you do. After everything you’ve done for us, anything we can do that will bring you pleasure, you deserve.”

“Cas…”

Heat covered Dean’s back, Jimmy leaning forward to press against Dean’s back, press all three of their bodies together. Fingers toyed at Dean’s opening to prepare him for the unbelievable intrusion to come. “Such a perfect sub,” Jimmy’s voice was rougher than Cas’, after the blow job he was close, throat dry, need more urgent. A finger breached Dean alongside Cas’ cock. Cas groaned at the pressure, noise trembling through Dean, shivering through Dean’s desperate cock. For an instant, he choked on a moan, coughing raggedly. If he voiced his pleasure, it’d all be over, he’d spill himself on Cas’ stomach. “Our perfect sub.”

“Need you, Jimmy,” Dean mumbled. The finger pulled out slowly, thrust back in wet with fresh lube from who-the-fuck-knew-where. Cas was trembling beneath him, shaking inside him, and Dean focused on the thin thread of pain in his lip and the singular, all-consuming thought of how much he _had_ to feel this. “Need you, Cas.” It was all he could do not to bear down against the cock within him, not to tilt his hips up and push them back down, not to take what he wanted from only Cas until he lost his fucking mind, until there was nothing left but Cas and Jimmy and their unbelievable, undeniable affection for him. “Need you both. So much. So fucking much.”

“I need you, too, Dean,” Cas gasped as Jimmy worked a second finger into Dean. Cas’ back arched up from the mattress, lifting Dean with him.

The fingers thrust in roughly, pulled out and tugged at Dean’s sensitive rim. Dean muffled a sob against Cas’ shoulder.

“We need you, Dean,” Jimmy agreed, rutting lightly against the top of Dean’s crack in time to the pumping of his hand. “We’re gonna make you feel so good.”

“Please,” the mortifying word won free of him, and Dean nipped at his lip once more to stop further pleas from escaping. Another sob choked in his throat.

“Shh,” Cas said soothingly. Cas’ hips faintly mimicked Jimmy’s movements. The slight friction, the light brush against the bundle of nerves that spun heated desire through Dean’s gut, spiraled Dean higher and higher. _Can’t do it. Can’t._ “You’re allowed to want this.” _Can. Yes I can._

Jimmy pulled his fingers out, tips catching on the rim, pulling Dean open. The familiar weight of Jimmy’s cock left Dean’s spine. For a moment there was nothing except the tug at his tight muscles, then Cas groaned hugely and the blunt, wet head of Jimmy’s cock pressed into him alongside Cas. Every heart beat felt like an unspeakable lifetime, flashing liquid fire against the backs of Dean’s eyes, scouring pleasure through his body from toes to finger tips, as infinitesimally, Jimmy forced him wider, made space for a second cock where no space should be. Cas moaned wantonly, grip tensing on Dean’s shoulders as if he too needed to hold on to something, anything, to keep from losing his mind. Jimmy’s silence was even more remarkable. Frantic, gasping breaths fell heavily in Dean’s ear as Jimmy, usually the most vocal of them all, silently pushed himself in to Dean’s tight channel alongside his brother.

“Fuck,” the word leaked from Dean’s mouth meaninglessly. “Fuck, that’s so much…” He was so _full_ , his body forced wide open and vulnerable to accommodate them both. His muscles compressed in protest and Jimmy sobbed in his ear. Jimmy wrapped his hands over Cas’, trembling, as he continued his slow progress. “So big, so good, so, so…oh God, yes, thank you, thank you, wanted this, wanted you, wanted you both, just this, so much, fuck that’s…fuck, it’s so good, so thick…” Dean knew he was babbling, but he couldn’t stop, didn’t want to stop, he didn’t have enough conscious control of himself left to prevent the words from spilling free. They only ceased when, with a shudder that might have been any one of theirs, or all three, Jimmy bottom out inside of him.

Bliss and euphoria paralyzed Dean. Cas’ cock was pressed unceasingly against his prostate, pressure so constant it was edging into pain. His heart raced and his cock leaked a steady stream of liquid. What little self-control Dean retained, he held by a finger nail. The twins were letting him talk, but they hadn’t told him he could move, and, more importantly, they hadn’t told him he could come.

Cas’ hands pushed up on his body as Jimmy leaned back, drawing Dean with him until both men sat straight up, Cas still flat on the mattress beneath them. The change in positions drove both cocks into him more deeply and Dean moaned pitifully, head falling limply back against Jimmy’s shoulder, eyes leaking tears of sheer ecstasy into the thoroughly sodden blindfold. One set of powerful arms wrapped securely around Dean’s chest. Another gripped his hips, lifting him up slightly, bringing him down again, and his jaw dropped, a wordless, hoarse cry forced from him by even such a slight movement. The hands lifted him again, lowered him again, and Dean did _not_ blubber with joy, definitely not...fuck it, he didn’t even _care_ anymore, it was so fucking good.

“Just like this,” Cas encouraged him, lifting him once more. There was no push to lower him, and Dean tentatively lowered himself, unable to process if he’d been given permission to mood. “Good.” Thumbs pet at the line of his pelvis, along his hips. “Good, Dean.”

Taking heart at Cas’ praise, Dean raised himself with his thighs and settled back down. Carefully, Cas thrust up to meet each of Dean’s movements, Jimmy pivoting behind him to do the same. Dean reared up, came back down, and there was nothing, nothing in the world except the two perfect men who gave him rapture, the two unbelievable cocks filling him as he’d never been filled before, the two voices surrounding him with their vocalizations of bliss, the two sets of arms keeping him upright, keeping him sane. Up, he went, and down, he went, and each time spilled mingled pain and pleasure through the whole fucking world. There was nothing else, _nothing else_ , and it was fucking _perfect_.

“More,” the word escaped his mouth devoid of meaning, though he knew it was true.

“Tell us what you need, Dean,” Cas’ voice was coarse gravel, sand paper against Dean’s skin. Jimmy’s only answer was to groan and give an awkward, hard thrust into Dean’s body. All awareness blanked for an instant.

“More,” he repeated. “Everywhere. Fill me...everywhere. Mouth…my mouth…”

One of the arms wrapped around his chest shifted, fumbled, and then there were three fingers at his lips demanding entry. Eagerly, Dean opened his mouth to them, curled his lips around them, sucked hard, lapping at the finger tips eagerly. Jimmy moaned brokenly against his back.

“Cas,” Jimmy’s hips pivoted again, urgently enough that he nearly forced himself from Dean’s ass. “Cas, I can’t…God…he’s so…Dean, you’re so…” Jimmy moaned again.

“If he can do this, brother, then you can do this,” Cas said authoritatively. “He won’t come until we tell him, and you won’t come until he does, understand?” Damp locks of hair brushed against Dean’s cheek – Jimmy’s face crashed into his shoulder, moving back and forth, smearing Dean with sweat. “Jimmy…”

“Can’t, Cas…” Jimmy bit hard into Dean’s neck as Dean sucked hard on the fingers in his mouth. “So good, Dean…feels so good…” A frantic thrust slapped balls against flesh – Jimmy’s balls, Cas’ thighs, Dean thought it must be – as the friction in Dean ratched up still further. Jimmy moved harder, faster, desperately rutting against Dean, rubbing against Dean’s whole back, forcing whimpers that died in Dean’s throat, forcing growls of frustration and pleasure from Cas. “I’m sorry, Dean!” A raw cry burst from Jimmy’s lips as the man released, painting Dean inside with come that promptly leaked out around the two cocks embedded within him. With a shuddering, sobbing moan, Jimmy pulled his hips back, freeing his cock with a wet noise, tugging his fingers from Dean’s mouth.

Though he was still filled, Dean felt so empty with Jimmy gone even though the man was still wrapped around him, arms at his chest, head on his shoulder, tears falling cold on Dean’s over-heated flesh.

“Sorry, Dean, I’m so sorry, so sorry, you deserve better, I couldn’t, I’m sorry...”

Dean’s arousal dimmed at the loss, the thoughts he sought to quell reared up cruelly. “Cas,” Dean whispered. Reaction set in hard, his body shaking. “Cas?”

“I’ve got you, Dean.” True to the words, the hands on Dean’s hips shifted to his sides, drawing him free of Jimmy, drawing him down until Cas held him close again. The shaking was uncontrollable and tears leaked from his eyes, his nose dripped, a trail of spittle leaked from the corner of his mouth.

“Did I do something wrong?” Dean managed around his crying. “I tried to…I tried…”

“No, no, you didn’t.” The words were soothing and accompanied by gentle sweeps along his back that felt like heaven – or maybe hell, from the way they burned, Dean couldn’t even tell any more – but there was a hard edge to them. “Jimmy let you down. He let us both down.”

“I’m sorry,” mumbled Jimmy somewhere behind him. “I didn’t realize it would feel so good.”

“We’ll talk about this later,” said Cas sternly. The words weren’t aimed at him – they weren’t, were they? Dean’s thoughts struggled towards coherency, fumbled towards the guilt that so rarely quieted, eager to take the blame for any wrong doing. “For now, Dean needs us – needs you. Instead of apologizing, find a way to help him. Now.”

“Yes, brother.” There was a snap of obedience in Jimmy’s voice, the mattress shifted behind Dean and then Jimmy’s warmth and presence were gone.

A sob burst from Dean’s throat.

“We’re going to give you this,” murmured Cas in his ear. “Still going to give you this. You just tell me if you need anything, okay?”

“Fuck me, Cas,” Dean sobbed into his shoulder. He couldn’t do this anymore, couldn’t wait any longer, couldn’t bear to be so high and feel so good only to crash down and be greeted by all the same horrible whispers. “Please, fuck me, please, I’ll do anything…”

“Dean,” Cas’ voice was firm. His arms rubbed along Dean’s back until Cas’ hands came to rest on Dean’s cheeks. Cas lifted him up, and though the blind fold blocked all his sight – and even without it he wouldn’t have been able to see shit between the tears and the pleasure searing white through his very bones – he could feel himself pierced through by the deep blue eyes that always saw straight to his soul. “That’s not what we discussed, but if it’s what you want…”

“No.” With a titanic effort, Dean pulled himself together, quelled the flow of tears, sniffled to repress his sobs.

“I got this,” Jimmy called from the direction of the closet.

“I got this,” echoed Dean, words nigh unintelligible. “I can...I think I can...I want to finish.”

Gentle hands lowered Dean’s head, gentle lips brushed against his, gentle words filled his head. “You’re perfect, Dean. I know you can do this.”

Padding feet stepped audibly along the carpeted floor, weight settled heavy on the bed, and Dean gasped, back arching, as hardness invaded him suddenly and roughly. Slick with lube and Jimmy’s come, the weight of a toy – one of their larger ones, he thought, his stomach giving a delighted flip – pressed into him and slid in with shocking ease.

“Yes!” Dean cried out. Lifting himself on his arms with an unexpected burst of strength, he rocked back against the cocks inside him. “Fuck, yes!” Up and off both dicks, down as hard as he could, and pleasure screamed through him, his thoughts wonderfully silent once more.

Cas’ hands grasped his hips and drove him down even harder on the next thrust, and Cas and Dean groaned as one.

“Harder,” Dean begged.

Behind him, Jimmy slammed the dildo deep. Dean threw his head back and howled in pleasure.

“More!” he cried.

The brothers, his wonderful twins, obliged. Pain flitted at the edges of rapture as Dean felt as if the lengths in him tore him in half, filled him completely. Fingers invaded his mouth and he sucked them desperately, and the world was sublime bright darkness and ineffable pleasure. His body rose and fell, every motion bursting heat and white to careen through him. His cock shrieked for release that he only barely restrained each time Cas and the toy crowded him so fully he couldn’t believe he could take them both. But he _could_. He could do this. He could be good. Jimmy and Cas decided what he could have. Heart and soul and fucking _mind_ , he trusted them.

“Dean,” Castiel’s glorious voice rumbled through him, the ideal accompaniment to his thoughts, holding him together as Dean teetered on the edge of shattering uncontrollably. “You are beautiful. You are brilliant. You are hard-working. You are caring. You are priceless. You are irreplaceable. You are perfect. And _you deserve this_.”

Another hard thrust. Fuck, but he couldn’t, he couldn’t…he was so close to succeeding but he was going to come, he felt so fucking _good_ and in the end no matter what Cas said he was still a fucking failure because he couldn’t hold himself back, he couldn’t, not with those tender words echoing in his head, not with Jimmy’s come lubricating his stretched hole, not with Cas throbbing inside Dean as he thrust into him over and over again, not with…

“Come for me, Dean,” Cas ordered.

“Come, Dean,” Jimmy echoed. “Come on, you’ve fucking earned it.”

With a guttural, dry cry, Dean let himself go, thoughts dissolving in utter rapture, body spewing release over Cas’ chest, muscles contracting and then going limp. He was falling, plummeting, slipping away forever but it didn’t matter, because…

 _I did it_.

When awareness returned, the blindfold was gone and Dean was sandwiched between two wonderful, firm bodies. Hands touched him gently, demanding nothing, expecting nothing, easing and adjusting his aching limbs, sliding slickly over his sweaty flesh. Whoever was in front of him, Dean was wrapped around them as clinging tightly was all that saved Dean from drowning – _they_ are _all that save me from drowning_ – and he wept into a muscled, bony shoulder. Jimmy, he thought. Jimmy had more hard edges than Cas did, for all that Jimmy weighed a little more. The moment was perfect. Bliss yet washed through Dean’s body and eased his thoughts, and there was nothing, delightfully nothing in his head except the way he felt, the warmth of the afterglow, the wordless affection communicated in every tender gesture the two brothers made. Cas was pressed close against his back, a leg tucked between Dean’s, an arm resting under his head, the other tracing the line of his side over and over again. Jimmy was flush with his front, legs wrapped around both Dean’s and his brother’s, one hand cradling the back of Dean’s head, the other touching Dean’s thigh, tracing along his side in counterpoint to Cas’, running along his arm.

_I’m allowed to have this. I earned it._

Dean never wanted this feeling to end.

Eventually, the tears subsided. Eventually, the aches began to overwhelm the glorious feeling of euphoric release. Eventually, the unpleasant feeling of sweat drying on his body and come leaking from his ass overcame even how nice it was to be cocooned by the two men he needed more than anything.

“Thank you,” he rasped against Jimmy’s shoulder. “Thanks…for that. I needed…I _wanted_ …thank you.”

“Are you ready to drink something?” asked Jimmy gently, easing Dean’s head up so that their gazes could meet. Blinking, Dean nodded and struggled to focus through thick, gummy salt encrusting his eyes. Jimmy chuckled and brought his hand around to gently wipe the liquid away. “Good. Let’s get you up, okay?” Jimmy’s features were a little pinched but his smile was broad and genuine, his clear blue eyes sparkled in the dim light in the room.

Together, the two brothers man-handled him into a sitting position. He didn’t have an ounce of strength left. Normally, he’d be embarrassed, but now he just felt a flush of pride.

 _I’m allowed to have this_ , he repeated. _I earned it_.

Reaching over to the night stand, Jimmy grabbed a glass of water left there presumably against this need, and Cas support Dean in a sitting position and held his head up as Jimmy lifted the cup to his lips. With experienced care, they eased the liquid into his parched mouth. His jaw hurt from Jimmy’s rough use, his throat burned and ached. Everywhere the cool liquid touched, it soothed and eased. Gentle fingers on his neck encouraged him to swallow, reminded him how to, and little by little, they got the water into him.

“You were perfect today,” Jimmy whispered, shame and awe in his voice, as he waited for Dean to swallow. It was getting easier with practice. “You’re always perfect, Dean – seriously, I mean that – but holy shit balls, that was amazing.”

“Didja come, Cas?” Dean asked, sounding a bit more like himself with the return of moisture to his mouth.

“What do you think, Dean?” Cas kissed his neck gently and emphasized the words by pressing his flaccid cock against Dean’s ass. Dean’s insides gave a desperate quiver, as if they wanted to feel pleasure or to protest the possibility of doing more or to remind him how much he fucking loved Cas’ cock, but he was too spent to experience more than a faint shiver. “That was amazing. You were amazing.”

“Are amazing,” corrected Jimmy. “You _are_ amazing.”

Color started to rise in Dean’s cheeks, his usual shame rearing its pathetic head. “Stop,” he mumbled. The twins understood him instantly, and neither said another word. Instead, Jimmy set the glass down, hugged him from the front as Cas leaned more heavily into his back, until there wasn’t an inch of Dean that wasn’t surrounded by them. “Thank you.”

“May we help you clean up?” Cas had his arms around Dean’s middle, hugging him tight. Sometimes, Dean couldn’t face them helping him, couldn’t bear to show that much weakness, and they always accepted that, always left him alone when he needed to be left alone, and were always, always, _always_ there when he needed them to be.

He had no fucking right to be this lucky.

“I love you.”

He had no right to have this

Both men went stiff against him, and Dean’s brain caught up to his mouth as he realized what he said. Weakly, he struggled against their twined embrace. Fucking _idiot_ , that’s what he was. What the fuck was he thinking? How could he fucking _say_ something like that? Everything was _perfect_ and then he had to go and fucking _ruin_ it, like he fucking ruined everything he ever fucking _touched_.

“Dean,” Jimmy’s voice was undeserved music in his ear, hands on his cheeks wiping away the tears he hadn’t even realized were falling.

“Dean,” Cas breathed against his cheek, voice low and rough and wonderful.

This was so much more than he deserved. Why would they hold on to _him_? Each one of them alone was utterly superb, and together they were mind-blowing, and somehow he got to have _both_. It was inconceivable.

 _No_ , a little voice in his head struggled against the sudden oppression. _They told you, you deserve this. You’re allowed to have this. You earned this._

That was bullshit. It was one thing to have his obedience rewarded. It was quite another to think that either of them would…

“I never thought you’d…” Jimmy whispered in amazement.

“I love you, Dean,” Cas said, shaking against his back. “We didn’t think…”

“Dean, we love you, only you,” Jimmy spoke, words followed by urgent kisses along Dean’s ear, down his stubbled jaw, over his chapped lips. Crazy son of a bitch, Jimmy was always fucking crazy, to kiss him after all that sweating and crying, to nuzzle at his fucked-out lips. They were both fucking crazy, fucking liars, they didn’t mean…

“Only you,” whispered Cas.

Hysterical laughter bubbled from Dean’s lips and the world teetered as all sense of balance disappeared. Next thing he knew, he was lying on the bed in a tangle of arms and legs and surrounded by laughter, his own, Jimmy’s, Cas’. It felt _good_. God, it felt so incredible. Laughing hurt, but it didn’t matter, it was a good hurt – a hurt he’d _earned_ , the voice in his thoughts whispered, earned in the best possible way – and Jimmy and Cas were laughing with him, surrounding him, _loving him_.

The thought killed his humor.

“I don’t deserve this,” he mumbled.

“How many times do we have to tell you?” Jimmy tugged Dean’s head over to meet the twinkle in his deep blue eyes. He leaned in and gave Dean a rough kiss.

Arms yanked him away from Jimmy, and then Cas was leaning over him, wonderful Castiel, gazing down on him, perfection incarnate – dark blue eyes, hairs fucking _ruined_ by sex, pale skin still flushed with afterglow, cheeks darkened by his five o’clock shadow. Both of them, fucking Heaven on earth. “ _We_ decide what you deserve, Dean,” Cas said. He leaned down and kissed Dean passionately. “You’re ours, now. Do you like that?”

How could they even ask him such a fucking absurd question?

“Yes.”

With much laughter and a bit of stumbling, the twins literally fucking _carried_ Dean to the bathroom and set him in the large tub. Normally, he’d have been ashamed, but somehow, it didn’t bother him anymore. If this was what they wanted from him, he’d do it. Because he was theirs. The thought brought comfort more profound than he’d ever dreamed of. As warm water splashed around him and the two took turns scrubbing him clean and kissing him, it slowly began to sink in to Dean’s head that this was real. He really got to have this.

He really got to have something he wanted.

A dopey, bemused smile won over his features.

Jimmy was behind him, rubbing his back, gently cleaning his ass. “We brought all your things in from the Impala. You’re staying with us from now on. I can’t believe you didn’t think we’d realize you were sleeping in your damn car.”

With a soapy finger, Cas flicked over each of Dean’s eyebrows, along his high cheek bones, down the curve of his chin. “Is this what you wanted, Dean?” Cas’ eyes sparkled with happiness.

“It’s perfect,” Dean confessed, feeling as if the weight of the world lifted from his shoulders. “You are both absolutely perfect.”

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoyed reading it. Despite my lousy day, I had a ton of fun writing this. :)
> 
> The toy that Dean uses is based on one I found while googling "blue sparkly butt plugs" earlier, cause that's something I GIS when I'm writing. [Here's a picture.](https://encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQ2q8ZcHJn6WPvesF703lycddNuIDS3ib6vBmLl_kMgGp0wvU5vzQ) (the actual toy is meant for vaginal play, though...)
> 
> Follow me on Tumblr at [unforth-ninawaters](http://unforth-ninawaters.tumblr.com/) to see my random-ass blog of art, fandom, feminism, LGBTQ issues, and babbling about writing, not necessarily in that order - or just if you want to chat, message, make a story request, or what-not...
> 
> (added 7/5: FYI...I lied, there's going to be a sequel...actually a prequel...it'll be done as a series, and I just created one for it, so bookmark or subscribe to the series if you want updates when there's more.)


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